Doulaing the Doula

When a doula calls you and ask you to be her doula you immediately jump to yes. I was honored to say the least. A fellow birth professional wants me to be her doula and she is a doula! Then the stress kicks in. Does she want me to be her doula to critique me or does she really just want me for the support she knows I offer my clients. I cannot tell you have many times these thoughts when through my head. It was a late evening text that prompted me to get my doula bags ready. "I have high blood pressure, a headache, and swelling. My dad is going to take me to triage to see what's going on." I replied back with a simple "yes please let me know as soon as they tell you something and if you need me I am on my way." I wondered if I would react differently when I got that text from her, but no I treated her like any other client. She became top priority and all other chores were put on hold I waited a bit before texing to check on her and when I picked up my phone there was an incoming text from my client. "They are admitting me!" it said. I began thinking in my head that she knows this is the downward spiral of chaos she was trying to avoid. Trying to be on a good diet, exercise, do yoga, all the good things pregnant women are supposed to do but this she had no control over. Her body decided that even though it was near a month early it was going to act out and give the doctor reason to call for an induciton. She didn't argue like I thought she might, instead she agreed because she knew if she went home the outcome could become worse than what it was right now. At this point mom and baby were both still in very good health and I was praying hard for a great outcome for them both as well. I spoke with Leah again a few hours later. She was in a room, getting her thoughts together and then it came...the nurse that we all dread whether we are a birth worker or just a mom in labor, the nurse that thinks vaginas are meant to push out mellons with no fear, no pain, and she would be millitant until it was done. The tears came, the fear came and of course the blood pressure that was already high began to spike even more. Oh dear night nurse can't you find any compassion in your heart? Do you need to see the wizard for a new one? I wanted to so bad to pull her aside and ask these things but I refrained. Instead I told Leah I would be right up. Away I rode into the night to rid the hospital of injustice, or so I thought. When I got there Leah was visibly upset and after I heard the story had every right to be. I asked if I could put some lavender and align in the diffuser and try to get her a little more comfortable. Shift change happened and the nasty nurse that brought all this fear and anxiety was now gone. Her new nurse was like a big huggable grandma that just wanted to see her do well with her wishes that were still intact. Leah was a trooper through all the magnesium sulfate, and fluids. I helped her though her contractions one by one. Breathing, counter pressure massage, a giggle here and there. It was like sharing intimate space with a sister I didn't know I had. She said she had no specific expectations that she knew I would do what I do and she was confident in that. She worked so hard and finally it came time that her body was so exhausted and worn from the magnesium that she could barely get to her knees to try to labor through her contractions. Together with her husband we decided and epidural was the only way she was going to rest and get a healthy baby here. The anesthesiologist came and administered the epidural with her husband in the room with her and I got a moment to step out regroup and eat a bit of soup. I came back in ready to let her labor as much as she could and get a baby in her arms as soon as possible. When the time came she pushed with all her might. Being the courageous woman I had grown to admire in the delivery room just a few hours before. I admired her for listening to her body, for knowing when she had to consider all outcomes and that everyone in that room as rooting for her and that sweet baby girl that was about to be born. Waverly was born and straight onto her mothers chest she went. All 4.9 pounds of her little self. Sweet, precious, and fatigued from all the magnesium sulfate just like mom. I knew she was a fighter the moment I saw her (just like her momma)! I stayed until all was well and mom and babe were settled in. When I was about to leave she gave me the most beautiful token of appreciation! A placenta pendant necklace...not just any placenta necklace but a hand crafted one from a glass maker in N.C. In the later days that came she told me how much she appreciated me taking control of the doula role and providing her exactly what she needed in her time of need. Doulaing the doula turned out to be a great experience one both of us will cherish for a long time!